Hollow
My mental health is getting out of control. It's often scary at times when I can feel myself losing control of everything.
There's been times were I've had enough of even being me. I pray that I could have an outer body experience and just float and not feel anything.
I've woke up and I know I need too get a grip of the problems i have but how do I get a grip of something when I don't fully understand what's going on my self.
I get embarrassed of my pain because what if no one believes me.
I don't need someone to talk to I just need people to understand what they are doing.
Bering scared of family and friends because of the constant questions. Questions and accusation on what they think I should feel and not what I actually feel.
I feel isolated and trapped in my own body and mind because of this constant pain and neglect I feel open my self.
My pain isn't ever discussed its just dictated to me.
Like my own pain and feelings are a dictatorship and not a democracy.
People preach that you shouldn't allow people to tell you How to feel and think but How can you stop them preaching when they are louder then my own voice I hold.
If rather write things in a note pad then share them openly and freely through speech and not literature.
Why do I feel that songs get me more than my own thoughts.
I feel like an ant in a lions cage. Not being seen or heard but just waiting for that attack.
Why am I no longer the lion? When did I transform into a ant in my own mind.
The ant tried to be so loud in a world full of lions.
I feel like my mind has become a lesson, but a lesson I not yet undestand.
I can only run. No longer have the ability to walk peacefully through the days that pass. I'm chasing a message that I can no longer see.
When will these games end with my mind and me.
There's been times were I've had enough of even being me. I pray that I could have an outer body experience and just float and not feel anything.
I've woke up and I know I need too get a grip of the problems i have but how do I get a grip of something when I don't fully understand what's going on my self.
I get embarrassed of my pain because what if no one believes me.
I don't need someone to talk to I just need people to understand what they are doing.
Bering scared of family and friends because of the constant questions. Questions and accusation on what they think I should feel and not what I actually feel.
I feel isolated and trapped in my own body and mind because of this constant pain and neglect I feel open my self.
My pain isn't ever discussed its just dictated to me.
Like my own pain and feelings are a dictatorship and not a democracy.
People preach that you shouldn't allow people to tell you How to feel and think but How can you stop them preaching when they are louder then my own voice I hold.
If rather write things in a note pad then share them openly and freely through speech and not literature.
Why do I feel that songs get me more than my own thoughts.
I feel like an ant in a lions cage. Not being seen or heard but just waiting for that attack.
Why am I no longer the lion? When did I transform into a ant in my own mind.
The ant tried to be so loud in a world full of lions.
I feel like my mind has become a lesson, but a lesson I not yet undestand.
I can only run. No longer have the ability to walk peacefully through the days that pass. I'm chasing a message that I can no longer see.
When will these games end with my mind and me.
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